Tuesday, 28 October 2014

Little man.

Me: "Your misses is fecking gorgeous, feck knows what she sees in you?"
Engineer: "I know, especially when I have such a small penis?"


Hit him with the clue stick!

So I've just taken a couple of days holiday from work to try and de-stress myself a bit.
My daughter needs a new headlamp for her car and given my job is management I rang the garage on Monday, my last day off, and asked them if they could do the work on the Tuesday, the following day.

"Sure, no problem."

Now boys and girls there's a reason I rang on the Monday, can you guess?

Came to work in my daughters car and my garage says the supplier hasn't got a headlight so the work cannot be done until Wednesday!


Thursday, 23 October 2014

Pick one.

Customer: "Will they be installing the anti-virus?"
Me: "No?"
Customer: "Why not?"
Me: "You didn't order it, I sent you a quote."
Customer: "Oh, was I meant to choose one then?"