Friday, 30 December 2016

Female Logic

Wife: "Don't forget it's Friday so it's, get it yourself night!"

Me: "OK Bubb."

Two minutes later.

Wife: "I'll nip to Tescos and get one of their meals for two if you like?"

Me: "OK Bubb."

#GoFigure

Tuesday, 13 December 2016

I'll give you a way out.

Prospect: "Hi, I'm interested in the 8470p you're offering. Do you sell to individuals?"

Me: "Certainly, however, I should remind you that those prices are EX VAT."

[Brief silence]

Prospect: "Umm? That's OK. Do we have an account with you?"

Me: "Sadly not. TBH even if you did it through the company you'd have to pay by debit or Baacs for the first few orders."


Prospect: "Hmm? Does it have USB 3.0?"

Me: "2.0 only I'm afraid."

Prospect: "Ah, now see, that could be a deal breaker."

Me: "Really? tell you what, why not go and have a think about it and ring me back?"

Prospect: "Yeah, I'll do that I think."

Let me just decode that for you.


Prospect: "Phwoah that looks cheap!"
Prospect: "Ooh maybe it's not as cheap as I thought?"
Prospect: "Maybe I can get work to pay the VAT?"
Prospect: "How do I get out of this?"
Prospect: "Brilliant he's let me off the hook."

:-)

Wednesday, 7 December 2016

How rude!

Caller: [Abruptly] "Can I speak to Dave please!"

Me: "Who's calling?"

Caller: "AXY & Co"

Me: "OK, that's the company, I was actually after your name."

Caller: "Tsk, it's Debbie!"

Me: "Ah, thank you. I'll just see if he's available."

Some people really are pig ignorant.