Thursday, 17 April 2014


Customer: "I need a Hi-Spec laptop something really stable for our business."
Me: "Well we have another customer who is in your line of work, I supplied them yesterday with one for just under £2K"
Customer: "Yes, the Director was thinking about £1K"
Me: "OK let me get a quote together for that and the other work you want doing."

A few minutes later.

Customer: "The budget for the laptop is £600.00."

And would you like me to throw in a box of crayons, some play-doh and a painting by numbers book? Hi-Spec pfffft

Friday, 4 April 2014

You rogue!

Customer: "This laptop you sold me is well dodgy!"
Me: "What do you mean dodgy?"
Customer: "There's no Windows 7 licence and when I went to register it someone has pulled the serial number off!"
Me: "They're under the battery."

click brrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Friday, 28 March 2014

When in doubt pull out.

Customer: "I think our printers broken? I've tried two brand new toner cartridges and it won't print."
Engineer: "Do you want us to come out and look at it? As you know it's chargeable."
Customer: "You might as well get us a new printer."
Engineer: "OK."

Three days later.

Engineer: "Hey Pete, you know that printer for xyz? I've installed the new one. I also found out what was wrong with the old one."
Me: "What was it?"
Engineer: "She hadn't pulled the safety tab off the side of the toner."
Me: "Bwahahahaha"