Friday, 29 May 2015

Playing Doctors and Nurses.

I went to the doctors on Tuesday, the last time I went was, ooh? Eight plus years ago? Now our doctors is one of those Health Centre jobbies, the type that has four or five practices in it. You take a seat and watch the banner display for your name. After a short while I saw "Peter C......... Room 5" I opened the door to a startled doctor seeing a patient.

Me: "Oooh sorry this is room 5?

Doctor: "Yes?"
Me: "Oh, it said Peter Cannon room five."
Doctor: "Peter Cotton"
Me: "Oops."

I had to go back again today for some blood tests. My appointment with the nurse was 08:50 so I arrived at a quarter to and was told to take a seat outside room 5. I waited and waited and waited and then noticed that there was also a banner display for the nurses, damn! I should have watched that? I bet the nurse is waiting in there for me? So I went and knocked the door, opened it, and there was some poor woman with her arm out her top having bloods taken.

Me: "I'm incredibly sorry, I thought nobody was in here seeing as I've been waiting 25 minutes."

I'd best make it another eight years before I go again. :-D


Tuesday, 19 May 2015

Hole Filling.

Yet again we're having some work done at Castle Cannon, part of which is painting the doors.

Wife: "You've put the rings back on the door handles!"
Me: "Yes, the paints dry."
Wife: "But they need doing again, look you can still see the old screw holes!"
Me: "You're joking? How'd that happen? I'll have to sand that paint off, fill them again and then we'll have to paint again."
Wife: "Really?"
Me: "Yes really. I have no idea what went on there? All I can think is the filler retracted for some reason but I've not seen that before?"

Not best pleased I went back to watching some Business Report. Ten minutes later.

Wife: "I think it might have been me with the filler you know."
Me: "How come?"
Wife: "I scraped them, I think I might have pulled some out."
Me: "Why would you scrape them? You sand filler!"
Wife: "I'm in trouble aren't I?"
Me: "No comment."

WOMEN!

Monday, 20 April 2015

It's not about blame.

Webmaster: "So what you're really saying is you've broken it?"
Me: "Listen, it's not about Ooo did what..."
Webmaster: "So I was right, you did break it?"
Me: "I think we should focus on the solution to the problem..."
Webmaster: "You broke it and you want me to fix it."
Me: "If by fix it you mean restore the image you have, then yes."
Webmaster: "You broke it."
Me: "I'm telling my mum!"