Posts

Showaddywaddy

Me: ♫ ♪ "Robert de Nero's waiting, talking, Italian" ♬ ♩ Bananarama is getting back together you know?

Martin: "I've never heard of them."

Craig: "pfft Martin hasn't even heard of Showaddywaddy either!"

Me: "I would NEVER admit to knowing Showaddywaddy."

I see no danger?

Image
Dear Nanette Newman
Please protect me from junior, inexperienced sales people.

PFY: "I think I may have infected my PC? I was talking to a bloke and I thought he was sending me an order so I opened the word attachment on the email but all that was there was a URL so I enabled editing so that I could click on the link and now I think I'm infected. Thing is, I also sent it to my colleague and he's opened it too."

Me: "So let me get this straight. You're sent an email with nothing on it with a .doc attachment. This doesn't concern you so you open the attachment which effectively is empty too and you are still unperturbed? Throwing complete caution to the wind you then effectively disable a security feature by enabling editing and click on the link in the .doc file and then, not content with that nightmare you send it to your colleague and get him to do everything you've done thereby infecting you both!"

PFY: "I know, I know."

Clearly you don&#…

Don't Care

Me: "Hi Dave I've got Rob on the phone asking for a is Dave available. Is your surname Available?"

Dave: "Na, mate My name is Dave Don'tCare"

Me: "Fair enough I'll tell him that then."

Bwahahaha

By whom?

Image
An IT manager for a fairly big organisation.

Customer: "Pete, that Adobe Acrobat Pro is a bit expensive. Can you have a look on your Microsoft Partner account and see if they do a cheaper one?"

Me: "Umm? The clue is in the name, Adobe? It's not a Microsoft product."


Can I borrow.......

Image
Customer: "Hi have you got a four or five port KVM switch lying around we could borrow for a few weeks and a Switch? We have some testing we need to do on old machines."

Me: "Hmm? I'm not sure. I might have some PS2 ones but I suspect you'll want USB?"

Customer: "If we have to buy something you can get some cheap Belkin's"

Me: "I think you might have to buy them tbh."

What a surprise. :-D


We bought it elswhere.

Image
Customer: "Hi we've just bought a new printer, just a quick question. Do I set it up via the WIFI or the disc that came with it?"

Me: "I take it you didn't buy it from us?"

Customer: "Well, no."

Me: "In that case we can set it up for you but obviously we'd charge you. The thing is, if you'd have bought it from us we'd be happy to set it up for you. I suggest you use the install disc that came with it."
Customer: "Oh, OK I'll have a go with the disc then."