Monday, 30 November 2015

You forgot to buy this!

I was looking for a bag for my Lenovo X201 12.1 subnotebook and visited a site offering a right bargain! A messenger bag reduced from £49.99 to £4.99! Like most sites you have to create an account to purchase so I started the process and noticed you could pay via PayPal. When I clicked on that service the price jumped to £49.99 which immediately rang alarm bells in my head, why would it be £4.99 with a debit or Credit card and yet £49.99 with PayPal?

I decided not to continue the process and now they're emailing me which is interesting seeing as (I believe) I did not complete the signup process or agree to receive emails? I find their "We respect your right to privacy" and yet receiving emails confirms my opinion that something's iffy here.

Dear Peter

Thanks for shopping at #########

We noticed that you put some items in your shopping basket during your last visit to our site but you left without completing your order. If you had a problem with our checkout process or you have questions, please let us know, we'd love to help.

For your convenience we're still holding on to the items you added to your basket, but only for a limited time.

Just click to return to your basket and complete your purchase now before the items sell out!

Resident Messenger Bag for Tablets / Netbooks up to 12.1" - Black 1 £4.99 ea
Total: £4.99
complete your purchase

If you would like help with your purchase then
please contact with your enquiry
or use the new Live Chat on our website from 9am-4pm.

The Satisfaction Guarantee

If for any reason whatsoever you are not 100% satisfied with your purchase then please return it to us within 30 days for a full refund of the purchase price paid.

We respect your right to privacy - view our Privacy Policy here.

Unsubscribe from future emails like this or unsubscribe from all ###### emails here

Wednesday, 25 November 2015


Colleague: "I've noticed you always start your requests on a negative? Why are you not positive? try staring with 'I know you'll have this, or You'll be able to do this."
Me: Sadly fifteen years of experience has taught me that I should expect a negative answer."
Colleague: "Well you'll be pleased to know that on this occasion your initial assessment was correct and I cannot get you out of the doggy doo doo."
Me: "Bwahahahaha"

Friday, 20 November 2015

You can't afford us.

As I get older and hopefully wiser I seem to get more and more depressed by people being in positions that clearly they either have no flair for or ultimately no idea at all what is required of them in their given role.  A cardinal sin in any business is to not have faith in your products or services, we shouldn't be na├»ve about it though, sometimes the standard or quality could be better but ultimately you need to focus on the positives when trying to promote yourself and what your company has to offer.
A far more outrageous sin is elitism! The idea that only a certain level of potential customers can afford to buy from you. While there is nothing wrong in targeting a specific audience focusing solely on one demographic is where your competition hoover's up all all the overlooked opportunities.

A-CustomersApprentice: "See the thing is I don't see the point of Facebook or Twitter for our company, LinkedIN possibly but most of these others are just personal interaction sites. The thing is most of our stuff starts at £100K and....."

Me: "Can I just stop you there! Let me refute that with some questions: Do you think that CEO's, Directors or Head's of Purchasing do not use Facebook or Twitter possibly in their personal as well as their professional lives? What about their partners? Or maybe employees of their company's? 'Word of Mouth' is probably the largest generator of business in the world, so with that in mind what if the CEO's brother or sister saw something from your company and told his brother [the CEO] about it? There's an opportunity you would not have had if you turned your back on those services purely from a, forgive me, snobbish stand point."

A-CustomersApprentice: "I'd not really thought about it that way, I see your point."

Clearly you'd not thought about it at all!

Tuesday, 3 November 2015

Who gets to choose

So I took some leave this week and I'm (under orders) off to Birmingham tomorrow to visit the new shopping centre with Lady Cannon.

Wife: "Tell you what bubb, I'll read out the list of all the places to eat in the food hall and you can choose where we eat."
Me: "OK what about sushi? That's raw fish."
Wife: "Eww! I'm not eating that!"
Me: "OK what about the noodle bar?"
Wife: "Eww! I'm not eating that!"
Me: "Umm? What part of I can choose am I not understanding here?"